He's Back

Too fast? I think not. I have found myself and now I have to show the world and hold true to what I have found. That is the key. Naybe then, just maybe, she can share the joy we had again. This is an email I sent to the Lady Li. Read it at your leisure...One question, first...

Are you ready?

You said I could fill up your inbox and I firmly intend to. I know this is the second in one day, but today is exceptionally rough, as is every single one before it and I fear for a good time after, but enough of the morbidity.

This may sound wishfully conceited and just like a cheap way to accelerate the process, but I want you to take it seriously and understand that I know I have a long road to travel yet.

If you read my blog you saw the entry about the volleyball game experience and how I glimpsed myself.

Believe you me, it was more than a glimpse.

I found him there. I found him playing volleyball with Tim Thorpe. I walked into that party, saw those people there, and dropped all defense. I let them take me to laughter and just, well for the third time I think I may have wrote it today, having a damn good time! I have never felt that good in so long. That's who I am. I realized it when I was there with them. To those people, I am the crazy kid who is their inspiration, I know, hold in the gasps. Their inspiration in faith. Me! Of all people! 'Who am I?', I asked myself. And that's when I figured it out.

I am Nick Pankuch.

I love being with people! I love making them laugh and hold their stomachs and making their faces hurt. I love playing sports and being bad at them! I love telling people how wonderful life is and what it feels like to the smell the sea, to stand outside in the rain, to roll down an old dirty hill, to stare at the clouds and seeing that stupid little camel you see every time! I am CRAZY! I love to make people laugh, but I don't care what they think of me. I'm way to enthusiastic about EVERYTHING! Life in and of itself is a reason to kick off your shoes and jump in the puddles! To go bowling in Canada! To go swimming at night and feel the cool breeze! To ride the tea cup ride at Disney World and feel like a little kid again. To run and scream and be the only sixteen year old....Five year old in existence!

I'm inventive, intelligent and creative. I want to cure cancer and help people everywhere in seeing life differently and getting past disease and sickness and into a different and better world. I love science and critical thinking and opening up the "box" and not just thinking outside of it but crunching it down and blowing it up all together! I love math and English and creative writing! I like to create places that don't exist and take myself to fantastical lands to be the hero and save the damsel and lead armies of light to defend against the darkness. I like to read and let others do the same for me.

I'm tall and covered in pimples and I DON'T CARE!!! I'm skinny and have really powerful legs, but no upper body strength at all. I have obnoxiously curly, blonde hair no that I let it grow out. I wear four aluminum chain links on my right ring finger and a rubber band and a rainbow WWJD bracelet on my left hand.

I love music! My whole family can sing and we do it as often as we can! We love to make harmonies to songs on the radio and even compose our own! We all play some type of instrument; I play piano and I want to learn how to play guitar and trombone! I love to share my music and voice with everyone I meet and raise it up in God's name!

I love to act! I've been in a whole bunch of school plays at my school and we've had a blast! It's fun to take yourself out of who you are for a moment and be someone totally different only to come back to yourself a moment later! I've been a psychotic dentist, a mentally challenged man, and a bustling young pirateer! Who else can say that?

I am Nicholas Berton Pankuch and I am no one else from this day forward. This is my creed.

I just did a somersault and it totally failed!!! Oh boy...

I know who I am inside and out and I know what I need to do now. The path just went from a dark scary country road to a lighted highway; still too long, but you know where you're going and, as long as there aren't any cops...*wink wink*...You can go as fast as you need to. And I'm bringing my friends.

I excluded one part of the email because, well frankly, I don't think the world is ready for that part yet, but for now you answer the question...

Are you ready?